Christian life is a hard life... long journey... today, i said something like... i should get a non-christian girlfriend... i think it'll be so much easier to find... hahaa... reminded me of what Aunt Pat said, "don't get too anxious"... i'm not exactly anxious, neither am i desperate... but i hate the way things are... hmm... i think i shall come out with a plan to get out of Singapore... seriously need to do something different about my life here... i shall find a chance to ask boss if i can go to Japan for a couple of months... maybe i can do that when i'm implementing the new module... oh God, can you make that happen please?
feeling a lot of different things~ i think i've been rather confused for a while now... i need to sort out my thoughts soon... feeling rather strained... by dunno what... i feel i've been left behind, by dunno who, dunno what... and so alone~ (trying to avoid using the word lonely)... i need to find a direction... it felt aimless... what should be my next aim? what is my aim in life? why do i exist?
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